Margaret is a sixty four year old widow. She’s usually very sensible and calm, but she feels like an excited teenager as she sits in her living room and waits for her phone to ring.

It’s Duncan

Margaret had been expecting a phone call all evening, but she still jumped when the phone started ringing at twenty past nine. Her heart started hammering in her chest as well, but she managed to say hello in a reasonably normal voice.

“So has he phoned?” her friend Pam asked.

“No, not yet,” she replied.

“How strange,” Pam said. “What time did he phone last night?”

“The machine said it was ten past eight.” Margaret slumped back on the sofa and sighed. “Maybe he’s forgotten he said he’d phone.”

“Yes, so maybe you should phone him!”

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Paula decides to go on an estate agent’s website during her lunch break. She’s been desperate to look at the details of a property in Sycamore Close ever since the For Sale board went up, and she thinks the house looks great, but her supervisor isn’t so impressed.

8 Sycamore Close

As soon as all the other girls had clattered off to the canteen, Paula went on the Internet and started searching for the website of a local estate agent. She was desperate to take a look at 8 Sycamore Close. The For Sale board had gone up in the garden the day before, but she hadn’t been able to look at the details at her mother’s house.

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Lucy is having lunch with her grandmother in a local pub. She thinks they have gone out to lunch instead of having their usual sandwiches because her grandmother has run out of bread, but it turns out that Joan has a cunning plan.

A Cunning Plan

Lucy had never been in The Red Lion before. She’d walked past it a few times in the past and concluded that it looked a bit of a dump, but it was actually quite nice inside, and there were loads of tempting dishes on the menu, but she was finding it very hard to decide what she should have to eat. She needed to concentrate, but her grandmother hadn’t stopped talking since they’d walked into the pub. First she’d gone on, in a very loud voice, about the landlord and his seedy past, then she’d moved on to her bunions and what the chiropodist had said, and for the last five minutes or so she’d been acting like a teenager and eyeing up all the single men!

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Geri is surprised when her husband tells her that she doesn’t need to phone her mother after dinner. She’s spoken to her mother every evening since her father died and she can’t work out what’s changed.

A Good Night’s Sleep

As soon as she’d finished her dinner, Geri sat back in her chair and looked at her watch.

“I’d better phone Mum,” she said.

“Oh, you don’t need to,” her husband Matt replied as he stabbed his fork into his last chip. “I meant to tell you, love. She phoned earlier and I told her you were working late.”

“Yeah, but no doubt she’s expecting me to phone her back.” Geri stood up and started walking across the room towards the phone. “I’ve spoken to her every evening since Dad died and…”

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Jenny is intrigued when her young son, Christopher, tells her that he remembers a past life. After asking him lots of questions, she finds out that he lived in Brighton before and suggests that they should go there to try and find the house where he once lived.

A Past Life

Christopher didn’t choose the best time to tell me he’d lived before. I was dashing around getting the living room ready for an angel party when he came downstairs in his cute doggy pyjamas and blurted out the words.

I stared at him in astonishment as he told me he could remember a woman who had been his mother before, and a tingle ran down my spine as he recalled living in a big red brick house, but there was furniture to move and nibbles to put out in the few minutes before Cassandra and my friends were due to arrive, so unfortunately I just didn’t have the time to ask him any questions or listen any more.

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Young Emily is not impressed when she puts some Christmas presents under the tree on Christmas Eve. There are already some presents there from her father to her mother and they don’t look very exciting. It looks as if Ian’s been buying household appliances again.

A Toaster or a Kettle

As soon as she’d put Emily’s presents under the tree, Rachel poured herself a sherry and sat down on the sofa, thinking how brilliant it was that everything was ready for Christmas. It was only ten past six on Christmas Eve, but she’d prepared the sprouts, made the mince pies and wrapped all the presents already.

When Emily had been young, she’d often been up doing things in the early hours of Christmas Day, but it had been easy to disappear off into her bedroom with the presents and the wrapping paper while Emily had been watching a movie that afternoon, and it hadn’t taken very long at all to wrap everything up.

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Soon after buying an amazing book about ghosts in a charity shop, Lucy drives miles to visit the widow of the man who wrote the book. The old lady invites Lucy in and as the two women talk, it becomes clear just how amazing the book really is.

All Because of a Book

As she sat down on the black leather sofa, Lucy smiled at the old lady she’d come to visit and marvelled at how her life had changed. Just days before, she’d been thinking how boring everything was, but since then she’d seen a ghost, been to a police station and driven further than she’d ever driven before – and all because of a book!

The old lady she’d come so far to see was the widow of the man who had written the book, and she’d been surprisingly welcoming when Lucy had turned up out of the blue. She’d hardly reacted when Lucy had told her that she’d come to talk about the book, and she hadn’t batted any eyelid when Lucy had explained how she’d got the address from the publisher. She’d just told Lucy her Christian name and invited her to come in.

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Bill feels mixed emotions when he hears his granddaughter coming in his front door. He loves Ruth dearly, but he knows he’s going to get another lecture because he’s been buying second-hand books again.

Another Lecture

When Bill heard his granddaughter coming in the front door, he finished his phone call and let out a sigh. No doubt he was about to get another lecture. Ruth couldn’t understand his obsession with books at all. Week after week she had a go at him about all the piles of books on his living room carpet, and she was probably going to really lose it today because he’d just bought another two bags of hardbacks at a jumble sale.

“Hi love,” he said as soon as she appeared in the living room doorway. “How was college today?”

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As Lorraine and her husband walk towards the village hall where a surprise birthday party is being held, Lorraine tells Sean about the people he is about to meet. She thinks she knows the villagers well, but the party turns out to be more surprising than she could have imagined.

Betty’s Birthday Surprise

Betty’s surprise birthday party was held in the village hall on a Saturday evening in January. Quite a few people were invited, and as my husband and I left home and started walking towards the hall, I decided I ought to give him a brief rundown on some of the major characters he was going to meet.

Since we’d moved to the village a few months before, he’d spent most of his time sitting on trains, but I’d volunteered to do some hours at the charity shop in the high street so I felt as if I knew some of the villagers pretty well.

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Elaine Smith has an epiphany exactly fifty minutes before she finishes work on a Thursday afternoon, and afterwards, she can’t help thinking that it couldn’t have happened at a better time.

Elaine’s Epiphany

Elaine Smith had her epiphany exactly fifty minutes before she finished work on a Thursday afternoon, and afterwards, she couldn’t help thinking that it couldn’t have happened at a better time.

If it had happened half an hour later, she wouldn’t have had time to plan everything, and if she’d seen the light half an hour earlier, she might well have mulled everything over and decided it was too much effort to change.

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As a result of her husband’s affair, Angela has had to move into an old house with her teenage son, Liam. At first, she is worried that her son’s singing and guitar playing will disturb the neighbours, but as it turns out, Liam’s talent changes both their lives.

Evie

I can’t be certain, of course, but I suspect that things would have turned out quite differently if we’d moved into the house in the winter. Nobody would have heard Liam singing if the windows had all been closed, but as it was, his beautiful voice drifted out into the garden on that very first morning while I was inspecting the foul and neglected fishpond and our new next door neighbour abandoned the washing she’d been hanging out and hurried across to the garden fence so she could speak to me.

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As she takes a sip of her tea, Sarah thinks about the situation she’s got herself into and wonders how she’s going to put her thoughts into words. She’s in a strange living room with two men she’s never met before, feeling very guilty about something she’s done.

Feeling Guilty

I don’t usually have trouble putting my thoughts into words. I teach the reception class at school, so I’m quite used to saying things in the simplest of terms, but I didn’t know where to start when I found myself sitting in a strange living room with two men I’d only just met.

I couldn’t work out whether I should tell the whole story or just get to the crux of the matter and tell them what I’d done.

“Right,” I said, after I’d taken a sip of the tea the grandson had poured me. “This is really difficult, but I’ve been feeling really guilty about something I’ve done.”

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Angie is shocked when she discovers who is haunting her house – and even more shocked when she finds out what she needs to do to get rid of the ghost.

Footsteps in the Night

After she’d switched the engine off, Angie stared at the white bungalow and sighed. She wasn’t at all sure that she was going to be brave enough to go and knock on the door.

The old man she’d come to see had lived in her house once, and one of her neighbours had told her he knew all about the footsteps in the night, but talking to him about the ghost was going to be terrifying, she thought, as she took a deep breath and tried to calm down.

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Claire is amused when she reads her horoscope at work and learns that her month is going to be ‘full of intrigue and excitement’. The month has only just begun and she’s already intrigued.

Full of Intrigue and Excitement

As soon as she’d put the phone down, Claire flicked through her magazine, found the horoscopes and broke into a grin. Usually the predictions for Geminis didn’t seem to apply to her at all, but this time the astrologer was spot on. He reckoned her month was going to be full of intrigue and excitement, and that was exactly how her month had begun!

About twenty minutes earlier Alison had come out into the reception area and caught sight of her next customer.

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Mags has lost a lot of weight, and one Monday she goes into work wearing a smart black trouser suit, which shows her figure off. Her assistant, Emma, isn’t keen on her new look, but Mags is hoping that she will attract the attention of a salesman called Matt.

Invisible

I feel a bit embarrassed admitting it now, but I spent hours trying on clothes before I decided what I should buy to wear to work on that Monday. I didn’t want to look so dressed up that it was obvious what I was up to, but I didn’t want to fade into the background either like I’d always done in the past, so I went for a black trouser suit and a pin striped blouse in the end.

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When she’s driving home after her first anger management session, Michelle spots a shocking pink Mini parked on her ex’s drive. After pulling over to the side of the road, she phones her best friend, Sarah, and feels the anger mounting inside her.

Lily the Pink

Michelle was on her way home after her first anger management session when she saw the vile pink Mini parked on Josh’s drive. For a moment, she was tempted to screech to a halt, sling her car into reverse and crash into the horrible thing, but something the counsellor had said must have got through to her, because after pulling over to the side of the road, she took a few deep breaths, snatched up her mobile and called her best friend Sarah instead.

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Mel has been lying to her son. She’s not proud of herself, but she only told him a lie because she thought it might help him.

Little White Feathers

When Mel heard her son going out of the back door, she looked across the living room at her husband and waited for him to speak.

“Well,” she said, after a few seconds when he’d done nothing but glare at her, “aren’t you going to have a go at me?”

“What would be the point?” Ben replied, as he slumped back into his chair. “I couldn’t believe it when you started telling our son a complete pack of lies, Mel, but I didn’t say anything then, and it seems pretty pointless saying anything now! If you’d told me what you were planning to do…

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After she finds a shocking pink sock in the washing, Mitzi convinces herself that her husband is having an affair. Unable to bring herself to talk to him about it, she rushes out to confide in her best friend, Gloria.

One Shocking Pink Sock

Mitzi had told herself that she was going to act perfectly normally when Kevin got home from work, but it was hard talking to him about everyday things when her mind was full of socks, and it was impossible looking him in the eye when she was convinced he was having an affair.

Her voice sounded all funny and there was a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach, so after she’d picked at her dinner and done the washing up, she grabbed the phone and called her best friend Gloria, deciding it was probably for the best if she got out of the house.

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Marilyn, a novelist, is feeling rather embarrassed when she goes to the door to pay her milkman. Her eyes are all red because she has been crying. She soon starts cheering up when she chats to her milkman…

One Year On

Marilyn was mortified when she heard the milk float pulling up outside. It was a year to the day since she’d thrown her husband out, and she’d been wallowing in self-pity ever since she’d got out of bed. For at least half an hour she’d been telling herself that she needed to get a grip and go and bathe her eyes, but she didn’t have time to do that what with Paul turning up so early…

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Gaby’s husband and children are all away for the night, so as soon as she’s done the washing up, Gaby sits down to read a book, thinking how good it is to have some peace at last.

Peace at Last

As Gaby closed her book, she glanced at her watch and thought how amazing it was that the evening was going by so slowly. It was only an hour since she’d finished the washing up, and she’d managed to read three whole chapters of her book since then.

If her husband and children had been around, she would have been lucky if she’d managed three sentences, but it was so much easier to concentrate when the house was so quiet.

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Natasha and Jenny have just been to a speed dating event. Natasha is very excited because she fancied one of the men and ticked his box, but Jenny hasn’t enjoyed herself at all.

Plenty More Fish

Natasha was amazed when her best friend Jenny said she hadn’t enjoyed the speed dating event.

“But I thought you were having a whale of a time,” she frowned, looking back towards the hall where the event had just taken place. “You were smiling every time I looked your way.”

“Yes, but I was just pretending to enjoy myself,” Jenny explained with a shrug. “I really wish I hadn’t gone now, Tash. I should have worked at Dad’s takeaway like I usually do. I would have earned some money then.”

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Barbara has OCD. Her hands are red and raw because she washes them far too many times in a day. She knows she’s being ridiculous, but she just can’t ignore the compulsion to keep washing away germs, even when she’s looking after her granddaughter, Charlotte.

Ridiculous

When Barbara saw her daughter’s car pull up outside, she dashed into the kitchen to wash her hands one last time. She turned on the tap, pressed down on the liquid soap dispenser and rubbed her palms together in a clockwise direction seven times. Then she did them anti-clockwise. She washed the back of her hands vigorously, scrubbed at her nails with the nailbrush, rinsed off the soap and started drying her hands on the towel just as Karen rang the doorbell.

She raced to the door, flung it open wide and greeted her daughter enthusiastically but Karen only managed a frown.

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Emma is a very caring person, but she’s had a bad day, so she’s not her usual helpful self when she comes across a stranger outside Nightingale Court’.

Simon Says

Emma had just been through one of the worst experiences of her life so she wasn’t feeling her usual amiable self when she came across the stranger outside Nightingale Court. She glared at the man instead of greeting him with a smile, and when he asked her if she could take a message to his mother in number twenty six, she just shook her head and sighed.

“No, I’m afraid I can’t,” she snapped. “I’m a carer. I’ve come to see one of my clients, and I’m running late as it is.”

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Clodagh has been made redundant and can’t find another job, so she’s been making salt dough models and is selling them at a craft fair. The fair is in the country so she’s made a lot of salt dough animals including six stupid sheep.

Six Stupid Sheep

As Clodagh put another twenty pound note in her biscuit tin, she smiled to herself and wondered what her husband would say if he knew she’d just sold her last salt dough sheep. He’d be surprised, that was for sure. He’d made it quite clear what he thought about her sheep when he’d seen her varnishing them a few days before.

“Who’s going to buy six stupid sheep?” he’d asked, screwing up his nose as he’d looked down at the models on the baking sheet. “Sheep aren’t the most attractive animals in the world, are they?”

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Six Stupid Sheep and Other Yarns is a collection of thirteen short stories reflecting the highs and lows of day to day life. Compiled from stories published through www.alfiedog.com, some of which have been previously published in women’s magazines, it includes such great stories as ‘One Shocking Pink Sock’, the excellent ‘So Lonely’, the ghost stories ‘Tapping’ and ‘All Because of a Book’ and the wonderful feel good story ‘Six Stupid Sheep’.

This is a perfect book to put your feet up with or read on the beach. With stories from 1200 words to 6000 words, whether you’ve got five minutes or half an hour, you’ve got time for a story.