The promise of peace on earth to all men of good will is often at its most stressed and fragile during the Christmas period. Yet the right present can still work the age old miracle of wonder and acceptance and bring contentment to the most unlikely recipients.

A Present for Joe

Over the laden table Joe met his wife’s eyes; red rimmed from their last fight.He felt the familiar prickle of irritation.

Too many screaming kids, too many people, and too much food. It didn’t need to be Christmas for his mother?in?law’s household to slop over so abundantly with chaotic disorder. It wasn’t just family, but all the people who boarded, or had boarded under the shabby roof of the rambling house and their friends as well.

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To start off your teaching life with ideals is one thing. To doggedly hang on to the ideal of somehow finding and nurturing that perfect bright mind after the reality of years of teaching is rather sweet, but not very realistic.

Mr Stinton and the Aliens

Mr. Stinton took a deep breath and started again. ‘In the stomach, the food is…’

There was another titter from someone down the back. Mr. Stinton paused. ‘If it isn’t too much trouble, Jones, bring that note up here.’

There was the scraping of feet as Jones stood to his full height and slouched forward, lank hair falling over pimpled cheeks.

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The tradition of Christmas dinners is deeply entrenched in all of us. The question is how strongly can it influence the actions caused by our subconscious mind?

Peanut Butter Sandwiches

“I said we are having peanut butter sandwiches for Christmas dinner,” Carmella repeated calmly to her shocked family.

“But it’s Christmas day,” her husband Bob protested.

“And I am entitled to one day off in the year.”

And it was going to be a very long day.  The children had started their Christmas morning at 5 a.m. unwrapping and playing with their presents.

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A pet loving family await a new baby horse with much anticipation and excitement. What happens when the new arrival is the wrong colour and not  as beautiful as ordered?

Sherry

‘It would be nice if Sherry had a baby before she gets too old,’ the mother of the household said one day to the family.

The pets of the household were a dog, three cats, several guinea pigs and a budgie.

Sherry the Welsh Mountain Pony, a middle-aged placid spinster, and gone to fat as the middle-aged often do was the most favourite pet.

The four children, Sherry’s most devoted fans and admirers, cried with delight.

‘A pure silver foal,’ Rose said.

‘Or a bright golden one,’ Noela sighed.

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The first love of any young male’s life is so often that very important bike, and what he actually paid for it is not remembered in time.

Sole Obsession

John Fosters was taking a short cut through the showroom when he first saw it. He fell madly and passionately in love.

The Black Triumph flaunted itself on the dais emitting a tangible lure of black, black power, promising the excitement of speed, endurance and stability.

The more John studied it, the more besotted he became. He was only twenty years old, after all. The excitement and longing moved through him like a fever. His right hand clenched around an invisible throttle.

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Read about a macho creation who admits to genuinely liking women and still respects them after knowing all their faults?  Does it help that the women seem to overlook all his faults in return?

Some of my Best Friends Have Been…

I’m a secure and sensitive new age sort of male. I enjoy going out on the town on the usual male ritual bondings, but I like women as well. Some of my best friends have been women.

My first experience of women was my mother; saddled with us three kids by her various suitors. She was a pretty female with an incredible talent for lavishing affection on all and sundry. I have always had a soft spot for females with that sort of talent.

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Christmas brings with it the same problem every year to everyone. The right and most perfect Christmas present for the most important people in your life. And everyone has a different solution to this  universal problem.

The Bread Winner’s Noel

Christmas Eve, and the young man sat on the post office steps with all the confidence of the suitably dressed male; dirty bare feet, and faded blue jeans frayed around the ankles.  The heavy leather jacket was ornately studded, and open to show his bare chest.

He had a problem.  It showed in the quietness of the heavy face, partially obscured by the straggling hair and beard.

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Tragedy strikes when Buffo the Boxer Dog is involved in a heartless hit and run accident. His family know it’s serious when he can’t eat. Will Buffo survive the ordeal?

The Casualty

Tragedy had struck! Our Boxer dog Buffo had walked into the path of a speeding car. A hit and run menace who hadn’t even slowed after the incident.

“See how white and shaken he is,” said one daughter, who tended to dramatize.

I wasn’t sure that a dog could be white and shaken, but I was prepared to concede a point.

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Why should a brilliantly talented window dresser ever be linked to the odd fact that people from the same store go missing?  What have they got to do with his window displays?

The Heat of the Noon Day Sun

At mid-day the sun casts no shadow, so why should I have even suspected?

The shadows puddled beneath everyone, as if hiding from the fierceness of the sun. Behind the shelter of my sunglasses and hat brim, everything was two dimensional, stripped and faded of colour, black and glaring white.

The street was crowded.  We had bumped against each other.  He apologised.  We exchanged casual words about the crowd and the unseasonable heat.  Inside the building my companion still appeared two dimensional, black hair and black eyes in a white face.

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Nothing can be more heartbreaking than having your missing pup suddenly accused of wrecking things and killing chooks.

Andy can’t believe that his pup is destructive and untrainable.  What would change his well trained and well mannered pup into such a monster?

The Mystery of the Missing Pup

Andy realised something was wrong when he saw the front gate wide open!  Sam, his beautiful German Shepherd pup was gone! Also he had pulled off his collar again. Andy picked it up. Perhaps his mother was right and he should have it buckled on more securely.

“Sam,” he called.

He searched the park, the creek and all the streets.

“You must have left the gate open and he wandered off,” his mother said.

Andy wrote out lots of notices.

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Happily ever after doesn’t often apply to the minor characters in fairy tales. This is what really happened in Cinderella.

The Rat

It was just on dusk, and the street was deserted.

He hurried towards and then past me; a stockily built short man, tidy gray hair and clothes, black eyes set too close together each side of the big nose.

It was sheer luck that I heard the patter of his feet running back towards me.  I dropped as the hand shoved at my back and grabbed for my bag.  My timing was spot on. Unable to stop, and helped by a quick jerk on his arm, he hurtled across my body to land in the gutter.

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Not all people believe that cats, once worshipped by the Egyptians, should continue to have pampered spoiled-rotten lives.  What happens when  some people resent the cats’ attitude problems?

Tiddles

Mrs. Patti Balse-Wilson was distressed.  She dabbed the lace edged handkerchief at the soft pouches under her eyes.

“I mean, I was devoted to Great Aunt Annie,” she protested. “But this is really carrying things too far!”

Mr. Bertie Balse-Wilson, who was doing all the carrying, despite his bad heart, just grunted.  A small removal van and driver had been hired to transfer the carefully tended contents of their small flat into Aunt Annie’s rambling old house, set well back in the overgrown grounds.

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