This is the tale of how young Wally Wallcott’s career choice originated from a bout of mass murder, blood and tears on England’s green and pleasant downland. But in the end was it the correct choice!

A Career Choice

It is hard to say precisely when one actually decides to pursue a certain career in life, but I am absolutely certain that I knew when my friend Wally Walcott did.  It all began with bugs at the bottom of the garden. Well, to be more precise, the bottom of the garden is at the top of the garden on account of the fact that the garden runs uphill.

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An encounter with the inhabitants of a crusty ancient oak, phantom antics in a department store, dubious laws where truth and reality take on a disappearing act, stirred by a feverish frenzy of religious mania, sprinkled with a soupçon of wanton cruelty, all within the first forty eight hours of my arrival hardly gave me a ghost of a chance of having the merry and glorious Christmas I had expected in an English town.

The Children’s Tree

It was after dinner that first night my uncle took up his glass and told me a story about the origin of the great oak tree on the Green in front of the church.

“How old is the tree?” I had asked.

“That, my boy, actually dates back to the time of Oliver Cromwell and the last Puritan raid on the church. The story goes that several children, enraged at seeing their parents being beaten up and the building itself being ransacked, took the vestments and plate into hiding…

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This is the tale of a fare dodging, free-loading  health endangering pest on the Paddington to Penzance inter-city train. He involves fellow passengers, police, and paramedics before coming to a rather sticky end!

The Unwanted Passenger

I am not sure when he boarded the London to Penzance train. It may have been at Paddington, for the doors had remained open for quite a while, though I did not actually become aware of his fidgeting and flapping until after Reading. This was mainly due to the fact that the coach was packed with commuters and shoppers, headed for the home-counties and well beyond.

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