Essence of Humour – 17 Short Stories
‘Essence of Humour’ is a collection of short stories which brings together the best of humour writing from 17 authors across the globe.
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Stories included: The Hit Man – Chris Cooke, Dear Mrs. Golding – Lorraine Coverley, The Fitting Room – John Malone, Saving Saturday – Arlene Johnson, Fortune Telling With Love Hearts – Paul Warnes, The Substitute – Sarah England , After a While – Peter Lingard , The Marmalade Cat – Raelke Grimmer, The Most Terrible Beast – Khristo Poshtakov , A Test of Friendship – Rosemary J. Kind , The Call Girl – Jaclin Azoulay , The Real Protester – Mel Fawcett , Twinkle, Twinkle – Tracy Fells, Signs – Clive Gresswell , It’s a Dog’s Life – Jackie Tritt , All Talk – Patsy Collins , Bella’s Sparkling Windows – Gill McKinlay
Play for Me – Raelke Grimmer
2000 words Literary Fiction
Rosa and her grandfather live together in a small apartment. Each relies solely on the other for company, yet Rosa desperately wants her grandfather to play the piano again. She constantly asks him to play, until he finally agrees, but his playing will come at a price.
Rosa lifted her head up from her work space, rolling her neck with two short cracks. All the room’s natural light had vanished since she’d sat down with her canvas almost two hours ago. She reached out to switch on a lamp. Her hand missed the switch on her first try and knocked against the solid wood of the piano which had unwillingly retired to live out its days as a table. Rosa got the switch on her second shot and light spilled across the room. Her grandfather hardly stirred where he sat in his armchair.
The Marmalade Cat – Raelke Grimmer
1660 words Humour / Women’s Fiction
This actor’s jobs have been steadily drying up. Now, he’s discovered the reason why: the marmalade cat. There’s only one thing to do: take revenge. The marmalade cat has ruined his career, so it’s only fair he should ruin the cat’s career, too.
This story is included in the Essence of Humour collection
There used to be a cat who sat on our driveway. A ginger long-haired creature who enjoyed leaving her fine hairs all over the front yard. She’d sit there all day. I didn’t like it. When Sharon went to work at eight, the cat was never there. Only when I got home after taking the kids to school did the cat arrive to take her place. I dreaded going home. Most days I prolonged it by going to the supermarket or listening to kids read in Maggie’s class. Eventually, though, there was work I needed to do at home and I had to return.
Vermin – Raelke Grimmer
940 words General Fiction
Trapped with only a creature for company, she finds it impossible to tear herself away, to abandon the pathetic animal. But what is she supposed to do when she can’t help it, and no one else will?
Nothing but a single pane of glass stood between me and it. It stared straight back at me, decrepit little eyes boring into mine. It stared at me as long as I kept staring back at it; I had no chance of winning the contest I was unable to drag myself away from. The creature’s scraggly arms and legs propelled itself around the cage-like enclosure it was concealed in. I forced myself to avert my eyes from the unsightly thing long enough to pick up my dress.